How do feel about Friday 13th? Is it just another day for you or do you try to avoid making any big decisions or going anywhere on this day?
With the help of google I discovered that there are specific words which describe both the fear of the number 13 and more specifically the fear of Friday the 13th.
Triskaidekaphobia ~ literally means superstition about the number 13, but is also used to refer to a fear of Friday 13th.
However, there is a new word, Paraskavedekatriaphobia yet to find its way into our dictionaries which it’s allegedly derived from the Greek words for Friday (Paraskevi) and thirteen (dekatreis) which means specifically a fear of Friday 13th.
I am holed up on my sofa, surrounded by my three furry friends in front of the fire and apart from refreshment and loo breaks I don’t plan to go anywhere. I’ve had several buckets of coffee and am trapped by deep fatigue, my body doesn’t want to move, my brain is foggy, it’s taken me an age just to type this far with numerous typo corrections, re~writing and wondering if at this point anything I have written has made any sense at all? Why bother with the blog? I am venting, pure and simple, distracting myself from the sheer frustration and annoyance that I cannot lay claim to my body and control it how I wish. Perhaps another coffee is required before I can continue further!
So, coffee downed and I’m still grumpy and the desire to vent is strong! I have a stupid tooth that I cracked one night when I forgot to wear my mouth guard. This one night of forgetfulness has resulted in 4 dental trips in 4 weeks, 2 repairs, 1 root canal & the final appointment resulting in prescription for a week of high dose antibiotics in case unseen infection due to low immunity because of ME was there but not visible in the x~ray. The antibiotics finished yesterday ~ my tooth still hurts. I go back to the dentist next week ~ we wait to see if said tooth will “settle down”. My dentist is flummoxed. The x~ray looks clear, I’ve had antibiotics to clear any invisible infection, so why the pain? Buggrit, buggrit, buggrit!
I also have Temporomandibular Joint Disorder ~ my jaw cracks, aches, locks and sometimes won’t close without a slight sideways movement. I clench my jaw so wear a mouth guard at night, perhaps this is partly to blame for tooth pain?
To add further to my grumpiness whilst reviewing my ongoing joint and muscle pains at my ME appointment last week I underwent a thorough history and physical exam. Resulting in a further diagnosis to add to my already growing list of Hypermobility Syndrome. Deep joy! I’m 8/9 on Beighton Score. My back prevents me getting 9/9 ~ I can touch my toes with legs straight but not with palms flat on the floor, this is most likely due to hurting my back in my nursing days as it was something I could do in the past. Advice on pain is currently to keep taking the amitriptyline (which I take for depression and doubles up as sleep aid and pain relief), keep joints warm and do gentle Pilate stretches. Thankfully I’m down for monthly reviews and worse case scenario will end up with rheumatology referral.
So today I am mostly cursing in a bid to vent my frustration, not a helpful exercise I know but somehow makes me feel a little better briefly.
On a positive note though, I have managed to improve my diverticulitis pains somewhat with the purchase of a Squatty Potty ~ having an already compromised pelvic floor (after a double prolapse repair) and have been ordered not to strain (which my haemorrhoids thank me for) with diverticulitis you can have either loose or constipated stools and intermittent flare ups when the pouches become infected (nice I know) the goal is to try and keep stools soft enough to not back up, so I have medication to try and keep my stools formed but soft. Then with my not fit for purpose pelvic floor I find with the different positioning using the squatty potty I can avoid straining as it allows bowel movements to just fall away easily ~ whoosh!
Which for me makes pooping a more pleasurable and less painful distressing experience.
Thank you for allowing me to moan and whinge, I reckon it’s about time to pop a few more pain killers and try to have a Nana nap.
Then because it’s Friday 13th and any attempts to cook will probably end in disaster and full kitchen meltdown a take~away for tea will be in order along with my friend Jack Daniels.
Raising a glass and wishing you all a good weekend, may your belly be full, your glass replenished and your ailments under control as best as can be.